Don't Be Sad if People Don't Listen to You When You Speak, Here Are The Principles You Need To Fix That

Assertiveness means that you can state your opinions in a firm but calm manner. When you communicate in this manner, people tend to listen to you more and it is easier for you to get what you want from them.

Here are 5 simple ways to help you become more assertive.

Pay Attention To Your Communication Style

The key to being assertive is to speak in a manner that people want to listen. This requires that you pay attention to your communication style. What kind of body language are you projecting? What kind of words are you saying? What is your tone like? If something is bothering you, speak up and never expect people to read your mind. Put up confident body language when making a request or stating a preference. Observe your posture, smile or keep a neutral face and look the person you’re speaking with in the eye.

Understand That Not Everyone Will Agree With You

In your goal to be assertive, it pays to remember that not everyone will agree with you. No matter how well you communicate, some people will still have their different point of views and that’s okay. When someone does not agree with you, try to work to understand from their perspective. Do not interrupt them when speaking and listen patiently to them. Remember, you can always agree to disagree.

Stay Calm

It can be tempting to get upset when someone misunderstands you or can’t see reasons with you. While this may make you feel better, it leads to nowhere and will only prevent you from communicating effectively. Instead, always try to stay calm as this will not only boost your confidence but will also make the other person feel relaxed.

Less is More

Assertiveness means simple, clear, and direct communication. This means you shouldn’t go into long-winded explanations when trying to assert yourself. Instead, you should say what you have to say in a clear and concise manner. Also, try to avoid accusing or making the other person feel guilty.

Use The Personal Pronoun ‘I’

In order not to come across as hostile, you should make use of statements that start with ‘I’. This way of talking helps you sound more assertive and ensures you don’t trigger the other person. Say things like “I feel…” or “I think…”. On the other hand, phrases like “You never…” or ” You always…” sound aggressive and can evoke defensive reactions from the other person. Using ‘I’ statements will allow you to assert yourself confidently without alienating the other person.

With practice, you can master these steps above and become an assertive communicator.