Arguments and how healthy couples handle them smoothly in their relationship. Find out here

Every couple argues. Don’t let anyone tell you differently on these streets abeg. No matter how happy you see a couple, or how in love they may seem to you, I promise you, they argue.

So, if you are about to get into a relationship or you are in one presently, know that arguing with your partner more often than another couple doesn’t mean you have a bad relationship. What really matters is are your disagreements healthy and respectful?

READ ALSO: Signs to Know if You are in a Codependent Relationship

Well, if you want to know how to have healthy and respectful disagreements, this post will definitely help you.

• You should keep it off social media: First things first, Social Media is not the place to air your dirty linens biko. Putting your business on social media is even worse than arguing in front of family or friends. Throwing your dirty laundry on social media will only open the door for third parties to judge your relationship and give suggestions where it is not needed.

• You should argue in private: If you find out that disagreement is starting at a public event or a family gathering, you and your partner should step outside to discuss the issue in private. People do not need to know your business.

• You should speak quietly and calmly: Screaming and yelling at each other only leads to aggression which generally leads to saying hurtful things that you don’t really mean. When a disagreement is starting, take a deep breath and speak quietly to help keep yourself and your partner calm. If you stay calm, chances are, your partner will too.

• You don’t bring up past mistakes: Look, if you’re upset with your partner, don’t bring up the last time you were upset which was 3 months ago. You have to move on from the past so quit looking back there. Focus on the situation at hand.

• You should look at the situation from your partner’s point of view: When you have a disagreement with your partner, try and put yourself in your partner’s shoes. Try to imagine if you would appreciate the same behaviour you dished out to them.

• You should walk away, if necessary: Walking away does not mean that your relationship is over. It just means you need to think about whatever just caused the argument or disagreement. You may be able to come back and talk in 20 minutes or maybe later that day.

• You should let go of your pride and apologize: Always, always, always apologize. If you realized that you messed up, own up to it and apologize for your actions. Then try to explain to your partner that you understand where they were coming from and what you plan to do to fix this behaviour in the future.