Relationships break up for a couple of reasons and some times those reasons are little things that add up and lead to the deterioration of the relationship.
Unlike major things like cheating, these other reasons why a relationship ends aren’t easy to spot. It’s important to be aware of them before it’s too late to do anything about it. So without too much story, we go straight to 6 silent relationship killers.
- Conflict Avoidance: Most people try to avoid conflict because it’s uncomfortable. However, avoiding conflict is a silent relationship killer because it prevents the opportunity for addressing conflict to take place. When you aren’t addressing conflicts, you’re allowing the negativity to fester. The important thing here is to learn how to deal with conflict in the right way.
- Invalidating Emotions: This is a tough one to avoid because it sometimes happens without you realizing it. For instance, if your partner says they’re cold but you aren’t, it’s easy to say, “It’s not that cold” without thinking anything of it. But little offhanded remarks like this can add up. When a person feels invalidated, they often feel disconnected and unheard and these two characteristics combined, will definitely work to deteriorate a relationship quickly.
- Unresolved Trauma: Everyone enters into a relationship with baggage whether we acknowledge it or not and this trauma that some people bring from previous relationships can hurt your relationship without you realizing it.
- Resentment: Unhealed resentments in a relationship can be a death hill for a break-up. Resentment can show up in many different forms and when there’s resentment in the relationship, it usually means there’s not enough open and honest communication. Communication is essential for healthy relationships.
- Stonewalling: This happens when a person withdraws or shuts down during a conversation or argument. They emotionally or mentally close themselves off from their partner due to being physiologically flooded or agitated to the point where they can’t discuss an issue respectfully and problems cannot be solved when one person isn’t making an effort.
- White Lies About Money: If one person is a spender and the other is a saver, you’re going to have fights. When one person hides their finances and the other finds out, it’s going to lead to trust issues. If your relationship is going to work, being on the same page financially from day one will help you avoid any kind of wahala.
Please note that this post is for people in serious relationships. Who date with the goal of marriage.
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